let me fly, i need a release, from these troubles of mine.

is it all real? am i fooling myself? i don't know.

i sincerely don't want to leave this place. i don't want to go back to school, with it's complications, and it's pettiness. it's all rather, stupid. i don't know what i should do. i can't think of any thing else to motivate me back. i've got approximately 48 hours. oh jesus christ. help me. i don't want to. it's so, boring. i have nothing to look forward to. it's not fair. none of it. i wish, i was given a break. but no, i'm never given a break. it's not fair. i don't know what to do. i guess the only thing i can do, is stick it out. let it all flow.

i'm going to have so much work to catch up on, when i get back. damnit.

i'm so confused as to what to believe in. i'm reading this book about a psychologist, who interviews a woman, who can recall previous lives... is it all true? can it be true? is that what this all is? it certainly makes some sort of sense. i guess, but i don't know. i wonder what i was, in a past life. i want to see.

you know thos epeople, that never have to struggle with anything? and everything in life just comes easy to them? i wish i was one of those people. concepts, are hard for me to understand, and i find it difficult to understand. i guess, we have our strengths. i'm not sure where mine lie.